Can we talk. . . .about SEX?

You've walked past a magazine rack, right...
Barnes and Nobles?
Borders?
Wegmans?
7-Eleven?

Why is it that Cosmo a year ago had "6 sure-fire ways to please your lover"?

Esquire a year ago gave guys the "secrets to making love"?

And both are running articles this year that promise the same!

Oh, and would you believe they ran similar articles in 2007, 2006, 2005, and so on?

Isn't there, like a 5-yard penalty for false advertising or something?

Maybe they're clueless.

Maybe you're ready save the $5 you would be spending on a magazine and explore why we seem to be having more sex and enjoying it less.

How about breathing New Life into your Sex Life?

Better sex in three weeks. That's our promise.

And unlike those other guys, we'll deliver the goods.

Check out the first of a three part series on, you guessed it - SEX!

This Sunday @ 11:00 a.m., and be ready for words you've never heard from a pulpit!

His way or the highway?

WAY!!

No WAY!!

WAY!!

No WAY!!

Ok, enough of that, but it does get us into the topic of one of the big questions out there. I mean, we've heard from all kinds of religious types on whether Jesus is the only WAY.

Is he, or not? And what's he the only WAY to?

I mean, where's he going with this thing?

Maybe we can figure this out if we look at what He actually said.

Not just what somebody's telling us he said.

Maybe that'd get us somewhere.

Think about it, everyone on a trip takes a look at the map occasionally to see if they're going the right WAY.

Maybe you could use a spiritual GARMIN check.

We sure do, and we're doing it Sunday at 11:00.

If you don't know the WAY to get there, just check the directions

WHATCHA DOIN' CHRISTMAS EVE?

We've got Christmas spirit, yes we do!
We've got Christmas spirit, How 'bout you?

Feeling festive?

Maybe not... Or, maybe you've got that holiday thing oozing out every pore.

(YUCK!!!!   Image-Be-Gone!)

Regardless of where you are on this continuum, New Life Christmas Eve is the place for you.

At 6:00 p.m., Wednesday December 23 (duh... Christmas Eve)

It's late enough not to interrupt your last-minute shopping, and early enough to have a great rest-of-the-evening doing whatever you want!

That's right.  We're gonna be outta there by 7:00 p.m.

There'll be some singing off-key stuff, a funny video, little kids doing little kid stuff (no diaper humor here, please), some cookies and such, and a short encouraging word or two, plus one special feature...

NO SOCK MONKEYS!!!

Guaranteed fun--and you get to wear jeans!!!

IF THE QUEEN MOTHER WERE SUDDENLY STANDING ON YOUR DOORSTEP. . .

You might be just a bit frantic!

I mean come on...

       ...WHAT WOULD YOU WEAR?
       ...IS SHE HUNGRY?  

       ...WHAT DOES SHE EAT?
       ...HOW DO I ADDRESS HER?
       ...WHAT IF SHE SEES THAT TURKEY CARCASS STILL SITTING IN THE FRIG?
       ...DOES SHE HAVE A BIG CHECK IN HER HAND FROM  PUBLISHER'S CLEARINGHOUSE?

Now, some of you wouldn't care at all.  You're not gonna get lathered up by anyone from a family whose men and women look the same.  Ok, good point.

For some of you, however, even the thought of drop-in by the queen--or anyone else who just pops in out of nowhere--gets your heart racing.

So, relax.  Take some cleansing breaths.  This isn't really happening.

OR IS IT?

Only way you'll know for sure is to be at New Life this Sunday for another installment of our "Dangerous Baby" series.

Be there!!   (And if you want, wear jeans... our preacher does!!)

FREE BABYSITTING - Parent's "Holiday Kid-Free Shopping Spree"

Dear Santa,

 

I've been a pretty good girl this year!  I hear Mommy saying that a Wii was cheaper than the current price of coal Oh yeah, world peace and an end to hunger would be sweet too!

 

ATTENTION PARENTS!!!

Let us help you, help Santa by offering you 3 hours of shopping time while we love and entertain your kids with cookie decorating, ornament crafts, music, movies and tons of great holiday fun in the spirit of the season! 

Our church is located just 10 minutes from Tysons and each parent will get a coupon folder JAM PACKED with great deals at Tyson's stores!

SATURDAY DECEMBER 13th from 9am-12:30pm 

 

All ages WELCOME!

 

RSVP to newlifewestmoreland@gmail.com to secure your spot!

Registration for the event ENDS DECEMBER 10th so don't miss out!

 

Then, be sure to join us again this Holiday Season and on Christmas Eve with your entire family to experience the REAL Reason for the Season!

YOU SAY YOU WANT A REVOLUTION?????

Maybe the Beatles coined the song...

...But they weren't the first to talk about revolution

          Before the French Revolution...
          Before the American Revolution...
          Before the Russian Revolution...
          Before cloth diapers gave way to Pampers...

(screeching of brakes)

Hey, speaking of babies, maybe you don't see the tie between revolution and babies.

But it's there...  Jesus... a baby! 

But this cuddly little dude packs a wallop in revolutionary ideas!

(Did we just say wallop?  Can we really use that in a blog?)

While we check with the judges on that, you check out the Dangerous Baby series!

Sunday, 11:00 a.m.

Tim Jones, New Life funny guy, kicks the series off, and he may just mess with your gray matter... at least enough to challenge your assumptions of who Baby Jesus is and what He is up to.

New Signs!

Keep driving by and thinking... I thought this was the right place, but wait there is no sign that says New Life?

That is all changed now!

Last week, New Life's Westmoreland campus got its new signs, letting the community know who we are.

So next time you drive by, you will know it is us... why not stop in?

See you Sunday!